I Smuggled Wine From a Church.

Today may be one of the greatest and weirdest days of my life, world.

You know those family gatherings where you learn crazy shit about your relatives? ...yeah. Today, after a 7 hour shift at work, I donned a pair of killer heels and a strapless dress and when with the mama to my cousin's wedding reception. I sat at a table with my mom, grandma, and my aunts and uncles.
Now technically I'm only related to my mom by blood... but that shit doesn't matter after that many beers. I'm not a fan of beer, but since it was a little more subtle than doing shots of my uncle's vodka, I settled. Next thing I know my aunt's throwing rice at my mom and I, and I'm hearing SO many stories about how my mother, aunt and uncle used to terrorize their old, rich babysitter. My mom was the one crawling up the laundry chute and scaring the shit outta her. Then, probably the third time I had to go downstairs to use the washroom (which reeked of WEED, might I add), I saw my aunt in the stairwell as she was chatting up two other guests. I started up the stairs, and she yelled, "BITCH, GIMME THOSE SHOES!" and I ran. I love her. But I ran.

It eventually escalated to the point where my grandma, aunties and I were all dancing like fucking maniacs to I Will Survive, while I flipped off my uncle because he refused to dance. Then his wife took a picture of me while this went down. YESSSSS

Work was shitteh. I cleaned. Big whoop. Was also sick.
I'm a beastmonster. I woke up this morning unable to move because I was so sick. Then I worked a 7.5 hour shift and then drank beer with grown-ups. SICK.

Tomorrow should be pretty chills. I have nothing planned and there's a tickle in my throat.
Does want new hurr. Cut 'n dye. Not all of it dyessss. Sum. Like under. Like... under. I don't know what the fuck...